People say you should be honest when people just want to be lied to.

"You are really selling the dream."

You may have heard a girl saying that to you. Or you know that the less you say, the more she can imagine, the more she can invest in the idea, fantasy or illusion of you.

Only when you are in the "seeing phase" or later in the relationship stage does the image she had of you slowly fritter away until disintegration.

We say men are the real romantics, but it is not entirely true; women are romantics in their own way. It just translates differently.

To get a buy-in with someone, there must be something that the person feels they get from you.

It is all about the story we love to tell ourselves of how our relationship came about.

It is the narrative you tell your family about how you met one another.

But also what you must feel before you give yourself to the other person.

For example:

Men: This girl is really into me and has given me what she has not given to anyone else. This girl is doing more for me than any other girls in my past have.

Women: This guy is looking beyond my looks and the superficial. He has his shit together. He makes me feel special whilst having his own backbone.

The reality is that when you have mentally owned someone, they buy into the narrative you played out in their head. You have developed in them an ego investment.

Why is Disney as big as it is today? Because it gave people what they did not consciously know they wanted.

Most people don't actually know what they want. That is what advertisers realised when doing market research before running campaigns. The people did not respond that much to the market research-based ads. Advertisers realised doing an ex-post analysis that the most successful ads they made were their own creative ones.

The mind is malleable to external influences, which shape its wiring.

Disney realised that the romantic fibre amongst people was one of the most reliable triggers they could exploit.

Religion and its practices fostered the illusion by curtailing true human nature. The secular world, empowered by free-market dynamics, unravelled how imperfect individuals are, where social media is the jumbotron to it.

Before, there was preaching in the mass, but now, there is mass sharing of the rawest and most unfettered side of each of us.

Where people can see some parts of the dark side, they feel hopeless, jaded, and defeated because the dream they have either been fed by Disney or through their undisclosed desire is being shattered.

When it is not their personal experience with divorced parents with shared custody or the observation of their close circle of friends and what is happening that fostered their cynicism.

This originally started in the late 60s with the sexual revolution, the legalisation of divorce, abortion, and now contraception.

What structured the good running of society has gradually gone into a state of spiritual decay, where the transactional side of interactions between individuals now dominates everything.

There are still segments of the population fighting against it and want to bring back the illusion from the ashes... the tradcons.

They are the equivalent of the kids who don't want to believe that Santa Claus does not exist because their whole belief system relies on that single factor.

The same logic is behind the idea that "not all women are like that.” They may not be like that now. Still, they most likely have been in the past, discounting how little the spiritual institutions previously running society have become irrelevant. And what are women without guidance with mainstream sponsored permissiveness? Eve is eating the apple.

Even if they have never been as such in the past, and what they say is actually true, it does not take away the possibility she can turn out to be like one of the other women they currently have disdain for. Everyone can develop a heroin addiction. Except now, they are being encouraged to partake in that activity.

Your current tradwife, considering the overwhelming destructive environment she lives in, will eventually influence her unless you have such a strong mental hold on her reality. Ask Steven Crowder for some testimonials.

Even for men, the reality is, provided they have the options, they would respond positively to the need of fucking other women than their wives. "Men are cheaters" is something you must have heard in the past. It is only the realisation from women that the image of what they have of men is being destroyed.

Through the bottom-up feedback mechanism that is social media, with the flattening of today's world and the ease of making encounters through digital means, both sides of the gender spectrum have seen the ease with which what you have built with someone over the years can be destroyed by a few clicks.

But now let's go on the single people.

What mass-dating has created is a swamp of disillusioned women, where they are stuck between the feeling of the need to have a man and carrying the past disappointments influencing their current experience when interacting with men, to the point they are convincing themselves they don't need past a certain age.

It is not hating on men; they have become the men they want to have because they cannot secure one over the long term.

It is one of the reasons why later on, they can't distinguish a guy who wants to fuck them from one who does not want a relationship with them.

Because they equated the fact they gave the sex away quickly based on lust as the reason they did not want a relationship with him.

Men, like women, respond more to emotional triggers when it comes to the attachment dynamic, which goes beyond sex.

Regarding disillusioned men, mass dating has created a playing field for hitting on fanny buckets for sports, fun, or catching up on lost time.

If it is a market, they feel they have been denied access to because the dating app algorithm bouncers have denied them, when it is not their lack of belief in the point of it all, knowing at best they will be the clean-up man to some used and discarded women who eventually realise it is time to hang up the boots of the alpha side of hypergamy.

When these guys have not been cast away to what would have been an originally good woman who previously went for what she truly responded to, a man who played out her lusty and loving side through his indifference and the rawness of the attraction she felt for him.

This leads to a more pragmatic approach from both sides, where they build their respective agendas and dealbreakers by aggregating their failed experiences, not to mention buffers. This makes them less likely to bond, as everything looks like a rulebook, when it is in breaking the rules that the more genuine interactions happen.

It is in the spontaneity and living in the present that authentic connections appear.

In the end, women have become physically ran through, and men too, but on the emotional side.

It becomes so hard to genuinely date after a certain age and "wealth" of experience if one does not understand the underlying dynamics behind their new standards.

A byproduct of the above is that people become more individualistic and, thus, less relationship material, which requires selflessness, especially on the woman's side.

Pandora's box is now open. It shows that unrestricted human nature and the environment we live in, which we call "life" in its truest form, is tragic, and you can only get the sweetness of fantasy at the expense of the sourness of reality.

Now you understand why you must lie to satisfy someone's undisclosed wishes. The more disillusioned they are, the harder it is to break their barrier. At the same time, the height of their disillusion is highly correlated to how deep they can fall for the narrative they secretly wish to be true once they break through that wall.

In the end, we all want to dream and feel good.

It is harder now due to the reasons mentioned above, where people have found solace in accepting and sponsoring the pessimism behind acknowledging the current situation in the most unforgiving way.